| I know its me... |
[01 Jun 2006|08:50am] |
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mood |
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Well I think Im finally begining to accept(again) that Its really over. Or maybe just I'm finally wanting it to be over. Its funny, when I was physically with him(i mean hanging out... im not that kind of girl sillies!) I didnt have the Ideas in my head that I formed once I left. Maybe its just that College wasnt quite as amazing as I had hoped... And this summer hasnt been quite as amazing as I hoped.... I supose I just filled in the empty space with day dreams... yep yep...
Oh well... He is rediculous, he isnt treating me well, he is probably using drugs, he is vulgar and doesnt share my beliefs and values...
When I put it that way...
lol >.>
anyway Work is fun. I have alot of friends. and its time to let go..... my life is good... Im just ruining it with expectations... darnit!
i luff you all!
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| Cat milking... |
[22 May 2006|10:06pm] |
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mood |
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 awake |
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Today had been a day of reflection. I'm finally getting somewhat settled in... or at least used to the idea of all of the changes in my life. This summer isnt going to be like last summer. Im not going to meet tons of amazing new people. Im not going to make brand new best friends. Im not going to have a summer romance... I dont think I want one anyway. I need some time to get my life in order on my own. This summer is going to be turbulent. vacations, work, moving...
I had a sleep over with Shani(my best friend from hershey park) last night. It was so different talking to someone who personally knows the people im thinking so much about. someone who has been a simmilar situation. someone who can relate in that way. I love Shani. We are so alike in so many ways. I guess thats bound to happen when your birthdays are 2 days appart...
Talking to her kind of brought back memmories of last summer. The way I felt about Eric. The uncertainty. the instant closeness... the complex feelings. It makes sense. And I know that I made the right decisions. I said alot of dumb things, but my decision was right.
but all of that talk left me missing the way i felt. Missing the crush and the accidental touches and the late night drives...
Im scared it wont happen again. I know we couldnt be happy together. I made the best choice... but im still scared...
I called Kim Jacobsen... I couldnt live without that girl! She is going through all of the same feelings and fears that i am right now and we have the church in common... the same perspective on life.
I feel better. I know its going to work out. patience is the key.
Im getting over my eating dissorder too. slowly im making progress... but its great. Its not a quick fix diet its a slow change. slowly my cicles of binging and dieting are getting less and less intense. there is deffinately a light at the end of the tunnel!
Life is good... its just hard to be stuck in the middle of everything...
ohh and i did milk my cat!!! she had kittens! 5 of them! so cute! hehe... muahahahahahaha
PS>
Im moving to utah! im not sure when im comming out but its official... we are adopting my 5 year old cousin and we will be living in saratoga springs(SP:::?) fyi.... yeah my life is crazy what can i say???
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| Wow... its been for FREAKING EVER!!! |
[03 Dec 2005|08:48pm] |
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mood |
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 discontent |
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People!!! i cant believe ive waited this long to post... gosh
well im a big collge student now... who is very confused/in love but yeah.....
basically about two weeks ago my grandma died and my uncle shot himself and died.... i went down for the funerals over thanks giving... sorry i didnt tell any of you i went down there....
and Eric called me. He was acting so crazy before. It was really easy for me to say "man im glad im 2000 miles away from him..." but when i talked to him he was so honest with me. he stoped the crazy talk and apoligized for a bunch of things i never told him bothered me. I want him to be happy... i dont know what to do... for more information give me a ring...
(717-381-6005)
anyway i love ya all!!!
~brittany
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| wow... ok |
[26 Jul 2005|02:09am] |
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mood |
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 drunk |
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ok... i chose drunk as my mood because the picture is how i feel.... i got 3 hours of sleep last night... and I just left the "V. L. Club"
and its really late and i have to wake up early so this will have to wait for later
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| ok |
[16 Jul 2005|08:49pm] |
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mood |
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 pleased |
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S"OOO HBP!!WawdlkfjWLEGKHwldkfhWLKFDJ
anyway... the book is awesome ... im on page 300...
lets just say i was right!
anyway....
to update all of you....
ok so a lot has happened since my last update....
anyway.... Eric likes me and I like Eric and that pretty much covers it....
just to tell you all he is very cute... and ... maybe he is 25... just maybe... lol
anyway yeah
so i must get back to reading about my beloved (harry...)
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| wow |
[26 Jun 2005|12:22am] |
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mood |
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 indescribable |
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music |
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wicked sound track song "for good" |
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Ok so today was .... great!
I seriously acted out of character.... well i guess i was just in a different situation than ive ever been in before so that makes sense.
Ok so I must start at the beginning.
Today at work I was scheduled to work with a guy I’ve never worked with before named Eric. ok so Eric doesn’t currently have transportation so when I arrived to work he hadn’t opened like he was supposed to. I was kind of disappointed because he is a great artist and I really was excited to talk to him.
well, Eric did eventually show up.
at first I didn’t really talk to him because he was kind of reclusive or something... well i would say he was just not overly gregarious today... but then he asked to draw me and we got talking about things.... Orson Scott card and napoleon dynamite and stuff. I asked him if he had seen napoleon dynamite and he said parts because his roommates didn’t get it because they only thought sex jokes were funny... but that he thought it was hilarious.
anyway from then on we were talking and joking and having fun.
then at seven when i had to go he helped me ring up my sale (i had to frame a picture and run a charge... he helped me run the charge)
anyway he was leaving and i joked that he must be leaving because i was leaving and there was no real reason to stay there without me and he agreed and then asked me for a ride home... hehe
well anyway... some how we got to talking about life and the way minds work and guilt and everything...
and I took a couple wrong turns so we ended up taking the long way to the place he is living... and when we were almost there he said "hey want to go over to borders and have a coffee?" and I said "well I don’t drink coffee but id love to have a pop."
and so we went to borders and had fun interpreting some modern art in a book. it was really a blast. I didn’t get home until like 11:30 (I’ve never just went off somewhere on a whim like that... but I called my mom so she want worried ^^)
the weird thing is I totally opened up to him. I told him about things that happened to me that ive never told a guy before (I’ve told close girl friend's but not any boys) It was just great being around him. anyway just for my memory I will list a couple random jokes/ events that i remember:
the scratching hand/ ball of magic
old tyme
the transparent skin
friends are dorks
the 4th 5 and 12 dimensions
the singing lady with the imaginary fiancé who wrote a message on the bench
is there chocolate on my lips
my horrible driving skills
square root of two
wrists ankles and shoulders
approved drawing style
hip hop
im just elated... it was so great having someone want to be around me (I havened felt like that for the past two years...) I don’t know... ^^
oh and my awesome bag I’ve been waiting for for months finally arrived!
today rocked
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[23 Jun 2005|12:58am] |
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Ok...
So i got all excited thinking "im going to stay up untill midnight the night before i can register for classes so i get what i want" unfortunately, i mixed up the dates... so bassicly i didnt get to take allot of the classes i was planning to take. whatever.... i guess i really just need to get into honors book of mormon.... maybe when i get there the teacher will let me in..........
Well, there was a party for the people i work with monday... it turns out im really glad i didnt go.... stories have now been passed to me from the source that jared laser chased poor tommy arround.... naked... not that i dont expect that from him... but im glad i didnt witness it.
I really hope i enjoy college....
ok i need to get up so bye bye
ohh!!! and i have lost 10 lbs so far on my new diet!!!
its pretty hard but yeah!!!
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| burnout |
[20 Jun 2005|11:25pm] |
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mood |
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ok so this week was hard!!!
it was my first full time working week and i started a new diet
im doing ok at both but im burned out! i dont want to go back to work tomorrow! anyway...i bought a new planner... its red
ok this post is dying...
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[15 Jun 2005|10:25pm] |
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music |
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soundtrack to a series of unfortunate events |
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hola nosotros!!!
today was another crappy day at work... well that just means slow ... it was actually pretty fun!
I drew a demo with my bunnie rabbit benvolio in it. soo cute! My friend Tommy told me that i have a big smile and that its the kind of smile that could ward off any negativity or depression hehe... that makes me happy. I really do like working at Kamans.
Today was also Kristy's birthday!! wooo hoo she is 15! Im really glad that ive gotten to know her better in the last two years. she got shoes and shirts and a cd player and the soundtrack to a series of unfortunate events (i am copying this as we speak muahahah) and i gave her three tiny glass animals that are really cute. we saw them at the glass shop at hershey park when i was going to training and we liked them allot. one is like a little lion, one is a funny little dog with a long nose and one is like a blue hedgehog with a peach on its head! soo cute!!!
And on a slightly random note, my dad has been acting muy strange lately. I was on a trip to vermont with him and at church they announced that one of the families would be moving. this family had a daughter who was noticeably dating a young man in the ward (they were like nineteen) my dad wrote me a note that said "this could happen to kristy" and i said what and he said "she could get attached to someone. the last thing she needs is to get her heart ripped out twice!" and when i looked up at him he had tears in his eyes. ok so kristy has taken the move kind of hard.. but thats a little bit of a melodramatic statement! my dad is just really concerned about everything lately... its a little amusing but i love him!
people are sometimes silly!
heart
brittany
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[15 Jun 2005|12:19am] |
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mood |
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annoyed |
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music |
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a song on coldplay's new cd i dont know the name of |
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Ok so today was kind of crap (www.engrish.com look in their online store at the tshirts). i worked and the park was dead and i made no money. and it was like a million degrees... ohh well... ive started planing my first semester classes for college and its really hard. ohh well... such is life i supose... ohh i started my new diet! the first two days you have to eat a million fruits. i was about to cry this morning because i didnt want to eat any more fruit... luckily on the actual diet you only need to eat two fruits! (i was eating apples in case any of you *cough*jen*cough* would like to know muahahaha!!!
~Brittany the mexican
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| bleh |
[13 Jun 2005|11:53pm] |
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mood |
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 confused |
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music |
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Miyavi - Night in Girl |
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Man, today was sure uneventfull!
I basicly cleaned my room... and drew a little... and played the sims.... well the sims 2 to be percise. (im engaged to one sexy sim named darby barnlow...)hehe
ohh and it took me like 5 hours to transfer all of my files to tonks! (good idea brin... im not sure why i didnt think of that) ohh and i downloaded like 10 random jrock songs.... man miyavi .... im still deciding if i like him... i think i do but im not sure o.O... he is one sexy looking beast though.... yes....
anyway i start a new diet tomorrow... im going to be skinny for college... maybe i will find darby barnlow's realworld counterpart! woot!
I think that my cat is pregnant.... for those of you who are not aware... henry went missing about a year ago and we got a new kitten who is now more of a cat... for the past couple days she was meowing all strange like and rolling on the floor in a creepy manner and stuffs (which i understand are signs that she is in heat) then she abruptly stoped. not only did she stop the crazy behavior but she got all nice and will now let me hold her and she licks me and i guess we will see in a couple weeks... they say their nipples change colors or something...
well i guess that means i will be checking kitty nipples for a while.... strange...
well i must now go to bed for i work tomorrow morning
ta ta!!
~Brittany
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| My new baby... (aww how cute!) |
[13 Jun 2005|02:01am] |
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mood |
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 creative |
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music |
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only the melodious sound of nymphadora |
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Ohh joy! Brittany received a beautiful laptop for a graduation gift! yay! well When i started her up a screen came up asking me to name the computer. after much thought and consideration i named her Nymphadora. So everyone say hello to Nymphadora... i need a shorter version of her name (any suggestions please comment) for a nick name.
Anyway to some more serious discussion, ive decided that it was important to get a new livejournal account since i don't play the oboe any more. so Pencilbox it is! ive also decided that this will be my journal and i will print the pages off because i can type heck of faster than i can write by hand(ok so maybe im stealing the idea from someone whose name starts with a k and ends in rista but hey...)Anyway i really want to keep in touch with my friends and i think this is the bestest way to do it!
I love you guys this much:
<--------------------------------------------------------------------------------->
[a million miles]
so yeah
its 2 am... ive been customizing for hours... i still have a little work to do .... so ta ta!!!
love always,
Brittany
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